It’s one thing to meditate daily. It’s quite another to do vipassana – a silent meditation retreat – for days. What comes up for you if you cannot be on your phone, cannot speak to another, cannot read or write, cannot exercise – so that you are still – for days?
This post shares my experiences with two vipassana retreats I did last year, what I learned from them, and some advice on how to plan for and fully experience one yourself.
First vipassana – Two Day – Monk Chat at Wat Suan Dok
Cost: 1,000 THB (for accommodation, food)
I wanted an introduction to vipassana, and Monk Chat was perfect. There were a total of four of us, so group was quite small. The monk spoke in good English – teaching us first about Buddhist principles, especially the four dharma seals. This ‘chat’ was at Wat Suan Dok, a very convenient location in Chiang Mai. The students and I got to know each other first (could speak then), but after a 30 min songthaew ride to Monkchat’s temple in San Sai, the vipassana started and we were immediately immersed in meditation.
I learned there was more than the standard meditation in lotus position. The monk taught us: walking meditation, sitting meditation, meditation lying down, and meditation while counting beads. He taught us a technique – through repetitive drills – to breathe in and out and recenter ourselves as thoughts come up. He made it a point that meditation is not about silencing your thoughts, but rather, about training the mind. The point is not to think about nothing; it’s to observe what comes up – simply observe, not indulge – and then recenter back to one’s breath. We practiced this breathing technique while we walked, while we sat, even while we were eating.
The accommodations at the temple were decent – similar to what one would find at a hostel. You have your own room. A cot mattress, blanket, and bed frame were provided. You have your own shower. No A/C but a fan is provided. The fluorescent lighting, cobwebs, and mold at edges of the walls definitely gave it a worn (‘rustic’ would be gratuitous) look. But I slept soundly.
We were also able to eat in the evening and again in the morning. 100% vegan – no meat. And one can snack on cookies and drink coffee/tea whenever one chose; a water cooler with cups were also very accessible. But it took some time to get used to the slower pace. I had to purposely slow down the walking from point A to point B. I had to slow down my eating. I had to force my mind to focus not on the past or the future but on the present – on the tea I was drinking, or the cookie I was munching on, or the vegetarian noodles that the staff kindly made for me and my fellow students.
The highlight for me was being able to join a monk in collecting morning alms around the neighborhood. It was so heartwarming to see the community (neighboring houses) offer food (often packaged up nicely in a clear bag) to the monk; we helped a little by holding the alms in a bag and joining the monk in chanting / giving blessings to the donor(s). I also thoroughly enjoyed morning meditation outside. We got to sit on mats laid outside and meditated for the longest during the retreat – a whole 30 minutes. Yes, ants started to crawl up my foot and leg, but thankfully no bites before the monk rang the bell. The monk would later tell me it’s perfectly acceptable to wave the ants off with my hand during meditation – just not to kill/crush them. Wish I knew that before!
The “two day” retreat was technically a little over 24 hours – starting at 1pm on the first day, and then ending at around 4pm the next. But I learned a lot about meditation and about Buddhism at Monk Chat, which set me up for a more intense retreat at Wat Phrathat Doi Suthep.
Second vipassana – Four Days – Wat Phrathat Doi Suthep Meditation Center
Cost: None (donation-based)
If Monkchat was ‘easy mode’ for a video game, then Doi Suthep was ‘hard mode.’ Several things made it noticeably more challenging. First, you can choose the number of days (so long as there’s availability); I chose four, but many choose much longer; and with increasing length comes increasing challenge to remain in silence. Second, there was much less structure – less things to occupy you. There was an early morning chant, breakfast, lunch, a brief one-on-one session with the monk, and evening chanting – that’s it! The toughest part was the afternoon after the one-on-one session and before evening chanting; it was 6 hours of nothing on the agenda but self meditation. Third, and yes you can call me a glutton for saying this, but no food or drinks were served after lunch. We were effectively fasting just like the monks. And I didn’t realize how reliant I was on calories to get me through the afternoon and evening. Luckily, I brought protein shake powder – which I could use with the water dispenser (and drinking was allowed) – which held me over so I wasn’t starving at night. Fourth, the accommodations were slightly more ‘worn’ than those at Monkchat. There were no A/C, no fans. I shared shower facilities with other men (didn’t have my own shower). The provided pillow was quite thin (I’m so glad I brought my own!). And yes, more cobwebs, more mold.
With the increased length and challenge, however, came more insights for me. First, I realized how much beauty is in the little things. Without anything that stimulate my mind, I often went to what was around me. And there was nature: trees, a view of the city, bugs, moss, etc. You notice everything. My attention was no longer on my phone. Nor was it involved in conversation with someone else or with consuming media or words on a page. So I shifted my focus to what was around me. And I grew to appreciate this beauty – often overlooked in my daily routines; it humbled me. Next, I grew in gratitude with what I have in daily life. I like to think of vipassana as a glimpse into a monk’s life – of which it’s quite simple. You wake up. You listen to a dharma talk. You meditate. You eat breakfast. You meditate. You eat lunch. You meditate. You chant in the evening. You meditate. It’s a very no-frills life. The meals are quite simple – and I’m sure get repetitious. So this life we have – especially my days here sitting in this very nice matcha tea house in Bangkok – is so much more appreciated after I have had a monk’s life at vipassana. I learned that I don’t need much to be content with my life. Last, I think I tasted some peace for myself. With that much meditation – and that much time away from consumption and distractions – I could actually calm down, not react to things. Gone (or at least to a minimum) were my anxieties, my stress, my constant planning and need for control. I could be. Simply be. And it was so tranquil, so peaceful, so blissful to experience this stillness.
A bit of advice
I want to end this post with a few practical tips in case you are interested in doing a silent meditation retreat in Thailand, and especially if you’re interested in one of these two retreats that I attended:
- Clear your calendar and notify your family/friends – there will be zero contact you have with your family/friends during the retreat. I’m sure you can power up your phone in your room late at night in case there’s an emergency, but rather than break vipassana, it would be much better for your experience to turn off your phone and keep it turned off throughout your entire retreat.
- Check the number of meals – and pack some protein powder – I was aware that Doi Suthep’s meditation center cut off meals at noon lunch. If this is the case for the retreat you are attending, then pack some protein powder (along with your tumbler). You may not need it, but it’ll be a better scenario for you to drink it rather than bearing your stomach growling right before bed.
- Bring things to give you comfort – especially on longer retreats – I’m referring to your favorite pillow or blanket or sweater. The idea is to give you comfort at night – so that you can have a restful sleep. You’re going to need this rest because the 5am bell can be disarming for most.
- Check the temperature and try to attend when weather is cool – Especially in Thailand, it’s tough to avoid hot and sweaty nights. Luckily, I did my vipassana in mid Autumn. It gets colder up in Doi Suthep, so it helped with my sleep.
- Have a half-glass-full mindset throughout the experience – You can choose to focus on what you don’t have. You don’t have five-star accommodations. You don’t have McDonald’s or Starbucks. You don’t have Netflix or Hulu. You don’t have family or friends. But look at the other side. You don’t have stress. You don’t have distractions. You don’t have work. You don’t have drama. And with these removed, you have something quite rare: peace.
If you haven’t done vipassana, I hope this post gives you a fair and accurate portrayal of the experience. And if you have, I hope this also validates your own experience.
And regardless of whether you have done vipassana or not, I wish you the same gift in your life that I received in mine – embracing the truth that you don’t need much to be happy. You don’t need much to be at rest. You don’t need much to be at peace.
~Lester T